I think I solved my reading problem.
A while back, maybe a month or 2 ago I was in barnes and noble. I was in the new age section and I picked up a book a book on Wicca and I read the interduction. It was basicly like a Wiccan mission statement. and I was agreeing with it all. I desprately wanted the book, but it was $25 and I was broke.
So now as I've been questing for the next thing to read, nothing has felt right. I've started just about every book I own, read a few pages and put it down. Not that was bad, it just didn't feel right.
I started reading Matildia last night and I read about a third of it. Becky told me it read fast, and it does. I enjoyed reading it, it is good, and I read it fast, but I just didn't feel right.
So today I went to borders. I stumbled around picking up books. I picked up a book titled The Master Colm Toibin. (no, it's not about bondage.) It has a beautiful cover, and I read a few pages in the store as I was fairly confident that I wanted to read more.
But when I went to barnes and noble later to pick up some Tea, I wandered around and found myself back at the wicca book. I sat down in the aiale for and read the first chapter. I then walked to a table and read another 30 more. I was so inspired. I had this feeling in my bones that there was a book I was supposed to be reading, and this why nothing felt right because I just wasn't reading what I was supposed to be reading. And I knew then that I had found it. I even read more this evening.
The book contains, for lack of a better word, exercises and I worked on 2 of them. They got me thinking about things.
So now I feel like I can sit down and read something, like Matildia, or harry potter and really enjoy them, without this constant feeling that something is missing in my life.
Sadly, I think I have to put off starting The Master because I do want to finish up some of these things. ...which again, I think I can do now and be perfectly satisfied.
2:25 a.m. - January 30, 2006
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