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| nothings changed the senates still corrupt & the emporer remains insane, and every day, is a new strain of slaughter, supply lines are less protected, evil on all sides, eye can smell the death on your flesh--creeping in, trapped within the twisting fingers of fear, and all eye see is ewe, that face, those eyes, burning like leprosy, eye can see u there poisoning the air, prostituing Nationalism, and eye want to attack, to rip out your heart and lay you flat on your back, and vomit a world of agony and truth into your throbbing illness of memory...and hate guides our way, eye long for the icy slap of a belt across my back, for the acceptance of death and blind cave war, the giving sleep of depression, the sweet elucidation of savage meaningless agression, chiseled in the meaty forearms of Mother Jupiter and his slave disciples, in the harem tents--outside, just beyond the edges--eye ride, a cycoptic mare in the fires of imagination. feeding my disease, a river of plagues, eye need something to remind me I'm still sinning that pain is important, that wurdz matter, that healing is possible, that eye am not alone ...in this --guard the houses--triple the watch,--Maidens, dig up your sorcery --sirens, sharpen your rocks..ewe will eat my pain again. whatever you need unite messiah ME --Wurdz by Otep Shamaya |
| The start of things to come/ June 10, 2007 10:22 p.m. Related Reading So I really am going to try and get back in the habit of writing every night. When I used to write I would just start typing and a thought would develope, and once I was in a routine I would have to right every night and I would have things just come to me instead of struggling to think of something importent enough to write about. Plus, it's been so long that I've written and so trying to start where my life is now is so hard to jump past all that time. But I've been working at a bank now for about 6 months. After my 90+ day review I got a bit of a raise and that put me and what I was making at the other job when I took the new job. (I was making $.15 more a the other after the review.) I decided that my time and health and well being worth more than that extra money I was making. I decided that I was really just time for me to quit my other job and focus at the bank completely. And I've been free for about 2 or 3 weeks now. I don't even know how I was able to do both for so long. It really feels like I lost about a year of my life. Ever since I got back from dragoncon last year I had been working non stop. At the store we had a lot of people go on vaction one week after the next and so we were picking up extra hours from late september right up to the holidays, and I got the call that I was hired for my new position the day before thanksgiving and then I started working 65 hour work weeks. Basicly I was wanting to clean my house right before dragoncon and now I'm finally getting around to it. slowly but surely my room is getting more organized, more clean, dusted, old clothes are getting moved now. I'm trying to cook more, thinking I'm going to start getting in the routine of working out again. and I keep agonizing over the fact that I haven't painting yet since I quit my job, which was the whole plan to be able to paint more. But I'm thinking that once I get everything clean and organized and just basicly get my life back in control then I can really put my time and attention into paint more. mmmm so this is about it for this train of thought. I was planning to right about another teensy aspect, but this is getting a bit long. Promise, the raven girl is back, back writing public entries (but still a few private.) |
Otep   |
| Me being overly analytical of Britney and Christina - July 31, 2008 - - Fantasy is sometimes better than reality. - July 24, 2008 Count Down with Keith Olbermann Special Comment - June 12, 2008 Reality Romances. - May 22, 2008 Layout by Raven Green |