Raven in Green again..

nothings changed the senates still corrupt & the emporer remains insane, and every day, is a new strain of slaughter, supply lines are less protected, evil on all sides, eye can smell the death on your flesh--creeping in, trapped within the twisting fingers of fear, and all eye see is ewe, that face, those eyes, burning like leprosy, eye can see u there poisoning the air, prostituing Nationalism, and eye want to attack, to rip out your heart and lay you flat on your back, and vomit a world of agony and truth into your throbbing illness of memory...and hate guides our way, eye long for the icy slap of a belt across my back, for the acceptance of death and blind cave war, the giving sleep of depression, the sweet elucidation of savage meaningless agression, chiseled in the meaty forearms of Mother Jupiter and his slave disciples, in the harem tents--outside, just beyond the edges--eye ride, a cycoptic mare in the fires of imagination. feeding my disease, a river of plagues, eye need something to remind me I'm still sinning that pain is important, that wurdz matter, that healing is possible, that eye am not alone ...in this --guard the houses--triple the watch,--Maidens, dig up your sorcery --sirens, sharpen your rocks..ewe will eat my pain again. whatever you need unite messiah ME

--Wurdz by Otep Shamaya

Sex and the City------paruu who'ed.
August 13, 2002 1:37 p.m.

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So I watched this weeks ep of Sex and the City last night. And I will admit it was one of the more riske eps they have had in awhile. The make focal point was oral sex. I mean the main question was about not being judgemental, but it seemed there was alot of oral sex talk. Carrie walked in on Samantha blowing a fedex guy, and Miranda met this guy at weight watchers who enjoyed going down her, but apparently he was quite a 'messy eater" and would have a certain something or other all over his face and then would want to directly kiss miranda.

Now the point is that about half way into the show my aunt came down an watched with me and was entirely offended by the whole thing and said that a show like that should never be allowed on Tv. I told her that it was a good thing that I opted to watch SATC instead of Queer as Folk, which I also enjoy, but was on at the exact same time.

Hell, I was more offended by one of Carrie's outfit (it was HIDEOUS!) than all the talk of oral sex. All I can say is...Pa rooo wHooed. She's just jealous that she can't meet a guy at weight watchers who'll give her head, and blind to the fact that some woman actually enjoy giving it.

update, less of the bad.
August 13, 2002 1:22 p.m.

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Things are seemingly better, or I'm just dealing with them better, so I came in to work today instead of opting to stay at the hospital all day.

I have about fifty different mental entries that I would like to write, but who knows if I'll have the time.

I will say that I am of the opinion that whatever 'fear' or 'worry' B supposedly doesn't have about his surgury/and or cancer is manifesting/displacing itself as Anger. Anger at everything else but the above. and honestly I can't blame him. Most of it stemmed from problems he was having in regards to moving out. (but honestly, I don't think that's it) And he told me on the phone yesterday that this situation went to prove him that "Everyone is alone, and has to face all their problems alone". ...that scared me, and I told him that he wasn't alone, and how I disagreed with that statement.

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Present

Coffee

Zeldman

Otep

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