My Thanksgiving
December 02, 2004 12:53 p.m.

But, in regards to other things in my life, let me go back to Thanksgiving.

While I didn't do anything this year to celebrate "Fuck OFF Puritian!!!" ...Day. I hope to in the future. Maybe next year. This would be anything the Straights find inapporitate. whether it tied up, leather bound do as your told sex. ... or maybe just sneaking away to give a blow job sometime before the meal.

But, again, none of that happened this year.

But, this was a fantastic Thanksgiving.

My aunt, uncle, and cousin came into town from Chicago.

Being an only child my cousin is the closest thing I have to a brother. He is awesome. I have always viewed my cousin as just the coolest guy in the world. He's smart, he's cool....he's a writer. Gamer dork, you name it. I have always had this need to impress him, and I always think I fail, I'm not really sure why, but I don't think he likes me very much. I always think that he just tolarates me no mater what I do.

I tried discussing Michael Cisco with him but he didn't seem interested. I showed him my new RPG book, the Vampire: Requeim. He looked it over and said cool, and that's about it. See, he used to like Masqurade, and I never got into that one.

I remember one year, Thanksgiving and Christmas siting down and getting and earful of Trent and Tori information. ....And then strangely, years later I buy The Fragile for my on reasons and fall in love with Trent myself.

We both were cursed with artistic brains,....and right now he's working as a parametic. ....somehow how he got a few on of the medical ones that I didn't inherit.

One of the high points was when we played chess. On thanksgiving, many many years a go, right after he joined the chess team, he convinced me to play game. I was quite young and didn't have clue to any of it. ....He kicked my ass in a few short moves,....and that turned me off to the game until Libby taught me last year.

So I was very scared about playing him. ....I was tired and nervous when the game began and I didn't start myself off very well. then he started to get the upper hand....I mindlessly gave away a few important pieces. ....Plus I had everyone watching me. My Dad looking over my shoulder, my aunt and uncle across the table. People critizing me or asking me questions. ...finally they all lost interest and left the room, but my mom, and my aunt I think, stayed in the kitchen cleaning up,...and every once and awhile my mom would ask how I was doing, and if I had lost yet.

Some where along the line I kinda stopped the bleeding, and at some point I saw what would be a good series of moves. The thing with innicating a series of moves is being worried of what will occur as you set that trap. ya know....is my queen protecting me in a way I'm not seeing and as soon as a move her being put into mate....or even the worry that I'm moving her to the wrong spot. ...I mean these things always seem too good to be true.

but it wasn't, that move really changed the power in the game....and while...it became pretty bloody, and pretty crazy, I did come out victorious! My cousin was none too thrilled,...and everyone in the family was suprised. Apparently my aunt quite playing him because he would always beat her.

But I love chess! It's so exhileration! That feeling when you know you're winning! You make a good move, that they leave unchecked because they don't realize it will lead to their downfall. I want to smile so big, I have a horrible chess/poker face. it is so hard not to react, but I have some way of supressing it. I hear my heart pounding in my neck, worried that someone else will hear it.

And while winning is fantastic,....I can acknowlege that that was a good game. we battled it out for a good while and were conistantly matched. as long as I feel like it was a good game a deserving match, I don't feel bad when I lose. I only hate to get my ass kicked, ...Or when I play with Becky and I have her on the ropes and do something stupid where she takes control and beats me in say 5 moves. That pisses me off.