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| nothings changed the senates still corrupt & the emporer remains insane, and every day, is a new strain of slaughter, supply lines are less protected, evil on all sides, eye can smell the death on your flesh--creeping in, trapped within the twisting fingers of fear, and all eye see is ewe, that face, those eyes, burning like leprosy, eye can see u there poisoning the air, prostituing Nationalism, and eye want to attack, to rip out your heart and lay you flat on your back, and vomit a world of agony and truth into your throbbing illness of memory...and hate guides our way, eye long for the icy slap of a belt across my back, for the acceptance of death and blind cave war, the giving sleep of depression, the sweet elucidation of savage meaningless agression, chiseled in the meaty forearms of Mother Jupiter and his slave disciples, in the harem tents--outside, just beyond the edges--eye ride, a cycoptic mare in the fires of imagination. feeding my disease, a river of plagues, eye need something to remind me I'm still sinning that pain is important, that wurdz matter, that healing is possible, that eye am not alone ...in this --guard the houses--triple the watch,--Maidens, dig up your sorcery --sirens, sharpen your rocks..ewe will eat my pain again. whatever you need unite messiah ME --Wurdz by Otep Shamaya |
story about the ceramics boy being ridiculously cute.November 11, 2002 10:49 a.m. Related Reading Note: on the same day that the Otep boy joins my friends and I for lunch, and loosens up enough for me to see some of what attracted me to him in the first place... That same day/night, the Ceramics boy and I ended up going and eating together at Tumbleweed. I say we ate together because it wasn't a date, we didn't go out,...atleast I don't see it as such, although he did pick up the check....and the restaurant was pretty effing expensive, although I ate cheap,.....point being, he gave me a ride home because (because of car issues) I rode my bike to class ealier that day, and being sick, and my legs being sore, I didn't want to ride home. So ...since I had been napping in the ceramics studio for awhile, when he got back he offered to give me a ride home. "We can just throw your bike in the back (of my truck)". Now truth be told, I was kinda hoping that he would offer this because I really didn't want to ride my bike home. And I was tired, and I did want to nap, but I assumed he'd be back..and I had hoped... yeah, so we ate dinner together, and it was cute. Oh, and earlier that day he did the absolutely most cutest thing in the world. Guys think they have to be all slick and cool for girls to want to do them....but honestly, he did something that day that if the opportunity had presented itself, I think I might have abanndoned all morals. See, I decided that I didn't want to ride home right after my sculpture class, so I decided I wanted to nap on the couch in the ceramics area, so I walked over there, and the Ceramics boy was talking to this girl in a wheel chair (with cutelittlelabhelperdog) about his pieces. See, last summer he did these five pieces which were all based on these stories about his family that his grandmother used to tell him. AND he was relaying the stories in detail to girl. I swear to you it was the absolutely cutest thing. This tall(but somewhat lanky and just suttlely buff.), southern, beer drinking, finishing hunting, ceramic dork was kneeling down and speaking in a rather soft sensitive voice to this girl, telling stories of his childhood! ~drool~ oh, and all this time I'm pretending to sleep just a few feet away (hearing everything). So the girl (who I've figured out is one of his students) offers to buy one of the pieces. The pieces being $350 each. She says it's because she really liked it and I guess she saw another piece in the series on campus and she told her parents that if she found another she would buy it and her parents thought she should and offered to pay part of it as a Christmas present. Now this shocked him because she's a student, and $350 is alot of money so, he offers to make her a few functional pieces, and wrap them up nice and pretty so that she can give them to her parents as a Christmas present. (again I'm pretending to nap, so he has no idea that I'm hearing this). Then he gave her a small tour of the grad studio, taking care to shut doors and leave in a way not to wake me. AH the cute-ness! so freaking cute!! he had to leave to go to this grad meeting thing (a giant wankfest). And actually maybe and hour and a half later when he got back I was still sleeping on the couch, but I started waking up when I heard someone come in. ~smile~ and at one point when I was laying there he came over and give me a joking body elbow to the ribs....joking, he really didn't do it,...just kinda playfully acted like he was..... and it was around this time that he offered to give me the ride home. |
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