Raven in Green again..

nothings changed the senates still corrupt & the emporer remains insane, and every day, is a new strain of slaughter, supply lines are less protected, evil on all sides, eye can smell the death on your flesh--creeping in, trapped within the twisting fingers of fear, and all eye see is ewe, that face, those eyes, burning like leprosy, eye can see u there poisoning the air, prostituing Nationalism, and eye want to attack, to rip out your heart and lay you flat on your back, and vomit a world of agony and truth into your throbbing illness of memory...and hate guides our way, eye long for the icy slap of a belt across my back, for the acceptance of death and blind cave war, the giving sleep of depression, the sweet elucidation of savage meaningless agression, chiseled in the meaty forearms of Mother Jupiter and his slave disciples, in the harem tents--outside, just beyond the edges--eye ride, a cycoptic mare in the fires of imagination. feeding my disease, a river of plagues, eye need something to remind me I'm still sinning that pain is important, that wurdz matter, that healing is possible, that eye am not alone ...in this --guard the houses--triple the watch,--Maidens, dig up your sorcery --sirens, sharpen your rocks..ewe will eat my pain again. whatever you need unite messiah ME

--Wurdz by Otep Shamaya

Art future
January 06, 2004 9:02 a.m.

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I did get an email from the curator at Rose Hulman telling me he had moved my work to a different location. See he needed it picked up around the 18th of Dec. but with work and the holidays and moving and everything I wasn't able to get down there, and he did suggest moving it's location.

but the email said that if I could leave it there till the summer, that would be great.

I mean, I don't have to pick it up, I get to show it somewhere longer, I don't have to worry about transporting in anyway (carring or driving) I don't have to find so where to show it right away....or more accurately I don't need to find a place to store it. This seems to be the perfect answer for the time being.

Once I get unpack and fall into some form of a normal routine then I'll get back to painting. I really do want to paint, I've been craving it alot lately, but right now I just don't have a location. I need to look for a studio. but I'm right now trying to get a grasp on my financial situation. I'll be nice to truly get a handle on the new expenses and how much money I have coming in. With Christmas being over I won't be dropping so much on gifts or decorations. We'll see.

Maybe I'll make up with my friends who have the studio and say "fuck you' to the boy. I don't know if I could do that, but it's a thought, especially since I've been seeing more of them.

eh...who am I kidding. I couldn't go to my studio space and walk in to find Jeff and ignore him, no I'd have to leave. ...Though honestly most of the time I've driven by their studio I haven't seen many cars in the parking lot, and none I reconize. I've been doubting that they were actually using it. But then I saw one parked on new years. Apparently they had a party there. I wonder if Jeff was going to invite me to it. ....Aric almost did.

Anyway, I'm starting to get paranoid that someone is going to walk in and find me typing this.

the point is that this gives me a bit of time to think and focus and add some direction to my artistic future. I haven't really done much of that since aug.

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