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| nothings changed the senates still corrupt & the emporer remains insane, and every day, is a new strain of slaughter, supply lines are less protected, evil on all sides, eye can smell the death on your flesh--creeping in, trapped within the twisting fingers of fear, and all eye see is ewe, that face, those eyes, burning like leprosy, eye can see u there poisoning the air, prostituing Nationalism, and eye want to attack, to rip out your heart and lay you flat on your back, and vomit a world of agony and truth into your throbbing illness of memory...and hate guides our way, eye long for the icy slap of a belt across my back, for the acceptance of death and blind cave war, the giving sleep of depression, the sweet elucidation of savage meaningless agression, chiseled in the meaty forearms of Mother Jupiter and his slave disciples, in the harem tents--outside, just beyond the edges--eye ride, a cycoptic mare in the fires of imagination. feeding my disease, a river of plagues, eye need something to remind me I'm still sinning that pain is important, that wurdz matter, that healing is possible, that eye am not alone ...in this --guard the houses--triple the watch,--Maidens, dig up your sorcery --sirens, sharpen your rocks..ewe will eat my pain again. whatever you need unite messiah ME --Wurdz by Otep Shamaya |
 Recent Answered prayers.October 02, 2002 11:45 p.m. Related Reading Wow, this is entry number what for me today? I've seen God working in my life the past few days....which is really nice! Monday night B and I went out to steak n shake and we were gossiping about the art department and some how I ended up confessing to him all my insecurities I have about my art and the department right now. I mean...I felt like I was creating good pieces and wasn't receiving any real feedback. And it seems people in my painting class are doing absolute crap and everyone seems to be praising them for it. And I was also feeling like I was absolutely hated in the department. Which I now realize that I'm not...I started wondering if it was a female thing because most of the guys dig me, but not the chicks...and then I had to tell myself that there's really only one chick that doesn't like me. I decided that it all boiled down to the fact that the people I really want to impress aren't around anymore. Those people being my favorite painting teacher who is taking time off to paint, this other chick, who got married recently and has lost the competive edge...and T. So after B and I left Steak n shake I was really depressed, like I get sometimes when I worry about my future and so I went home and I prayed alot about it. And then the next day, my favorite painting teacher popped in for a visit before class! and then I started this piece that I know is really good, which I finished for the most part today,...and I received alot of good feedback and compliments on the painting I showed people today. (see previous entry). It was just BAM all those prayers and concerns answered immedately, almost like reassurance from God that I am in fact on the right path. |
Otep   |
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